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When I was twenty, my momma said
“Honey, go out and have your fun, but see there
Those friends will come and go
But your family will always be there.”
And she was right, to some extent
Insomuch as all those other people came and went
And I’ll regret those carefree times we spent
For as long as I continue to breathe air

Not not not
For the reason she thought thought thought

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead

When I was thirty, I had a baby birdie
Who could fit into a dirty old washcloth
Those kids hopped on our train
But we knew that soon or later they’d hop off
Change trains and head out west
And leave us with an empty motherfucking nest
And in retrospect the happy times were quaint at best
And I’ll regret ‘em til the day that I drop off

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead

When I was eighty I slept a little later
On account of my circadian rhythm
My bae didn’t wake up that day
Should have known that I would outlive him
C’est la vie, c’est la merde
We had a decent run while I was unimpaired
And I’ll resent the million tender moments that we shared
Til I’m pushing up the daffodils with him

‘Cause of lost lost lost
Opportunity cost cost cost

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead


Lauren London - vocals

Copyright 2023 Zach London

Download Song

Such a vanilla song, C+
Too hard to hum along seamlessly
Genius has no need to draw
Attention to itself
Cosmic dust bunnies, we embrace the noise
We will do trust falls in the dark and mix La Croixs
We will put ransom notes in unmarked graves
Drive a Volkswagen bus through sneaker waves
Hell, yeah!

Why are we even here?

So was I put on this earth for driving Donuts in the church parking lot?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

You never had it rough, oh please.
You don’t secrete enough elbow grease
Flash that peace sign, index down
Can we be less than friends?
Cosmic dust bunnies, we embrace the noise
We will do trust falls in the dark and mix La Croixs
We will put ransom notes in unmarked graves
Drive a Volkswagen bus through sneaker waves
Hell, yeah!

Why do I even try?
So was I put on this earth for driving
Donuts in the church parking lot?
Yeah I think so.

Two and a half stars
Two and a half star review
Two and a half stars
It’s why I have to leave you
Two and a half stars
Two and a half star review

Cosmic dust bunnies, we embrace the noise
We will do trust falls in the dark and mix, and we’ll mix La Croixs
We will put ransom notes in unmarked graves
Drive a Volkswagen bus through sneaker waves
Hell, yeah!

Why are we even here?
So was I put on this earth for driving
Donuts in the church parking lot?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no

Lauren London - additional vocals

Copyright 2023 Zach London

Download Song

Baby’s own dad killed Marvin Gaye
Hiugh Jackman’s dad died on Father’s Day
Reading all night so I sleep all day
Reading all night so I sleep all day

Hey, tables have turned
And I’ve learned this from the tables
Beggars can’t be cheaters

Oscar Wilde died without his shirt
Steinbeck outsold and outlived Hemingway
Vonnegut’s grave says, “This might hurt.”
Reading all night so I sleep all day
Hey, tables have turned
And I’ve learned this from the tables
Beggars can’t be cheaters
Lay lay label me down
And I’ve found that I don’t like labels
But let me get my readers

Setting out drinks for the second coming
Setting out drinks for the second coming
Setting out drinks for the second coming
Methinks no one’s feckin’ coming, come on

Joan of Arc burned her favorite clothes
Natalie Wood’s yacht garb got waterlogged
Vonnegut’s grave says, “So it goes” Reading all night til my brain gets clogged
Hey, tables have turned
And I’ve learned this from the tables
Beggars can’t be cheaters
Lay lay label me down
And I’ve found that I don’t like labels
But let me get my readers

Setting out drinks for the second coming
Setting out drinks for the second coming
Setting out drinks for the second coming
Methinks no one’s feckin’ coming, come on
Come on


Lauren London - additional vocals

Copyright 2023 Zach London