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I was driving by the fire department
With my phone safely locked in the glove compartment
And my hands were at 10 and at 2
I was keeping my eyes on the road, as you do
I was signaling, using my mirrors
Comprehensively
Patiently driving defensively
Checking my blind spots, avoiding distractions
Eschewing improvident actions

When that pedestrian came out of nowhere
Pedestrian came out of nowhere
And the guy with the walker
The kids playing soccer
And the cyclist came out of nowhere
And everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do
Everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do

Back in the day
I was smitten with two girls named Faye
They were both in the corps de ballet
The three of us were backstage lounging on the chaise
I said, “You don’t meet many Fayes these days”
Well, the first of the Fayes averted her gaze
And the second Faye? She looked away
And I said, “Et tu, Faye Two?” but I was unfazed
And we parted ways, and I was alone
And with zero Fayes in tow, I drove home

When that pedestrian came out of nowhere
The ambulance came out of nowhere
The dog and its owner, now a cadaveric donor
And the garbage can came out nowhere
And everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do
Everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do

I really wanted a tire swing
Didn’t need a whole Jeep, but I bought the whole thing
And I drove it home with the hope
Of removing one tire to hang from a rope
But I didn’t have a rope, so I bought a tall ship
With the hope that with rope my new ship was equipped
And I threw out the ship and I bought another Jeep
To drive my tire swing to your place to rock you asleep

When that pedestrian came out of nowhere
And the Zamboni came out of nowhere
And the tetherball pole and the field hockey goal
And you, Your Honor, came out of nowhere
And everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do
Everyone came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do
Everything came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do
Everything came out of nowhere, Your Honor
There was nothing I could do


Copyright 2023 Zach London

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Seems if I
Want to stay, want to stay dry
I’ve got to live, got to live beneath the water table
Or above, or above the cloud line

Anosmia to petrichor
Impervious to grief
I’m whistling the walk-on’s leitmotif

Yeah
Better than keelhauled
Through a buttermilk sky
Why?
Better than feigned victimhood
And how?
How do you speak truth
When your throat is bone dry?
When it’s better to shut up for good

I’m so so lost
Little Red, Little Red said
I’m lost in the mondegreen
I’m so so lost
As Gretel fled the gingerbread shed
I’m lost in the mondegreen
In the mondegreen

I’m between
The quiet hours of beta testing a lexical war machine
Retroflexed McGurk effects
Don’t cry, tone crime, don’t cry
Then you don’t be so mean

While shuffling through a zipper merge
On the cloverleaf
The klaxons play the walk-on’s leitmotif

Yeah
Better than keelhauled
Through a buttermilk sky
Why?
Better than feigned victimhood
And how?
How do you speak truth
When your throat is bone dry?
When it’s better to shut up for good

I’m so so lost
Little Red, Little Red said
I’m lost in the mondegreen
I’m so so lost
As Gretel fled the gingerbread shed
I’m lost in the mondegreen
I’m so so lost
Little Red, Little Red said
I’m lost in the mondegreen
I’m so so lost
As Gretel fled the gingerbread shed
I’m lost in the mondegreen
In the mondegreen


Lauren London - additional vocals
Micah Wolkenberg - drums
Shaina Wolkenberg - piano

Copyright 2023 Zach London

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When I was twenty, my momma said
“Honey, go out and have your fun, but see there
Those friends will come and go
But your family will always be there.”
And she was right, to some extent
Insomuch as all those other people came and went
And I’ll regret those carefree times we spent
For as long as I continue to breathe air

Not not not
For the reason she thought thought thought

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead

When I was thirty, I had a baby birdie
Who could fit into a dirty old washcloth
Those kids hopped on our train
But we knew that soon or later they’d hop off
Change trains and head out west
And leave us with an empty motherfucking nest
And in retrospect the happy times were quaint at best
And I’ll regret ‘em til the day that I drop off

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead

When I was eighty I slept a little later
On account of my circadian rhythm
My bae didn’t wake up that day
Should have known that I would outlive him
C’est la vie, c’est la merde
We had a decent run while I was unimpaired
And I’ll resent the million tender moments that we shared
Til I’m pushing up the daffodils with him

‘Cause of lost lost lost
Opportunity cost cost cost

Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
More time time time time time
Wish I’d spent some more
Hours in the office
Time in the off
Time in time in the office
Instead


Lauren London - vocals

Copyright 2023 Zach London