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Roman Roman Roman
Roman Roman Roman
Roman Roman Roman
Roman Roman Roman
All right!
All right! All right!
All right! All right!
All right! All right!
Let's take a crack at antiquities and rarities
And harken back to the era of the Pharisees
Want to interact with Bellerophon and Pericles?
Too bad.
They're Greek.
We're Roman
Whoomp, there it is!
Their gods were first
Okay, but ours aren't parodies
Ares and Nereus are just embarrassing hilarities
Hades and Pluto exhibit primarily polarities
And ladies, Juno never parroted Hera. Please!
Comparing these deities
There's substantial disparities
You're reading into
Circumstantial similarities
Of Mercury's and Hermes's
Of Hercules and Heracles
Though apparently Medusa was both
My eyes are up here, boys
Stare at these!
Eros, the seducer, shot arrows that were looser
Than arrows shot by Cupid or Jupiter who was
The the heir apparent of Zeus's, apparently inheriting
A group of stupid excuses for deities so heinous
That we had to make up Janus and retire the Pleiades
So render unto Caesar
Render unto Caesar
Jeez, Louisa
Render unto Orange Julius
The original orange leader
Roman Roman Roman
Though the age is Golden
Keep them goddies Roman
All right
All right! All right!
All right! All right!
Cry "Hear ye's" with fervor
For Ceres and Minerva
My dearies, you deserve a change
From wimpy Olympians
Are you not entertained?
Are you not entertained?
Your orgy was projected to at least draw a quorum
I cordially accepted, taking exception to moral decorum
I hope it thwarted your boredom
I heard, of course, it was awesome
But, well, a funny thing happened on the way to the foursome
Pliny. Pliny the Younger.
Pliny the Elder is fine, but the son's a whiney-ass drunkard
Just a drunken failure, just a punk in regalia
Who regaled me with crock until I had to bail on on your bacchanalia
So here's to Roman sandals,
And here's Roman candles,
Cheers to weird Roman baths
And severely queer Roman scandals
We're here, combattin' Vandals
Chatting in Latin, believe us
We'll knock you flat on your back and back to Romulus and Remus
So render unto Caesar
Render unto Caesar
Jeez, Louisa
Render unto Orange Julius
The original orange leader
Roman Roman Roman
Though the age is Golden
Keep them goddies Roman
You guys!
You guys! You guys!
You guys!
On lakeshores in tunics
Let's make wars with Punics
And take scores of eunuchs
As our prize
Cry "Hear ye's" with fervor
For Ceres and Minerva
My dearies, you deserve a change
From wimpy Olympians
Are you not entertained?
Are you not entertained?
Are you not entertained?
Are you not entertained?
Based on "Rawhide" by Ned Washington and Dimitri Tiomkin
Lily Carlson - additional vocals
Lauren London - additional vocals
Scarlett London - additional vocals
Erika Sauld - additional vocals
Copyright 2018 Zach London
