Such a Funny Story

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Justine grew up near Mt. Carmel
Hiding from her brother’s friends
The Susquehanna River was
The furthest West she’d ever been
God knows it wasn’t safe to swim in

Such a funny story needs a laugh track, doesn’t it, kid?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?

Shaggy dog
Lost the world’s shaggiest dog
The sign said get a reward if you return the world’s
Shaggiest dog
She found a shaggiest dog
Went there
The butler looked at the dog
Said that it was too shaggy a dog

Such a funny story needs a laugh track, doesn’t it, kid?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?

Her dad was injured in Kuwait
Officially by friendly fire
Some new recruit he’d tried to prank
Went nuts and shot him in the thigh
Both were dishonorably discharged

Such a funny story needs a laugh track, doesn’t it, kid?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?

Shaggy dog
Lost the world’s shaggiest dog
The sign said get a reward if you return the world’s
Shaggiest dog
She found a shaggiest dog
Went there
The butler looked at the dog
Said that it was too shaggy a dog

Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it, kid?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it?
Such a funny story needs a laugh track, don’t it, kid?


Copyright 2020 Zach London

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